Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
