He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
