If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
