I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
