...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
why do cheetos always look like penises
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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