dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
