even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
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