You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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