i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
