This girl is more easily done than said...
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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