last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
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