She went from zero to smokin in five shots
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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