Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
