I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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