Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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