I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize