Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
false alarm. still invincible.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i used baking grease as lip gloss
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
