Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
