I seem to have left my pride at pride
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
