He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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