so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
