Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
