My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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