you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
