Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
