Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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