I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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