You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
