Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
This is the high leading the old right now
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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