Nicole vs. Life
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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