i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
