his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
