hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
