Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
