i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Ketchup is God's man juice
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
