He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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