umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
