this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
