i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Randomize
