Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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