Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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