i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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