You're completely useless in the revolution.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
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