I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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