cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I need water and some morals
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