I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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