So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I'm jealous of your bromance
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
