and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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