Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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