Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Congratulations! We have a period
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
